Do you mostly pay more attention to what is wrong than what is right?

Do you often demand bigger better faster more from yourself?

We are educated to problem solve and wired to protect. Both attitudes weigh more heavily on threat than opportunity, and both are so embedded that we are unconsciously and habitually attached to these ways of moving through life. Especially driven over-achiever types like you probably (because you are reading this) and me.

These old ways deliver results AND are exhausting. There is an easier, gentler way to achieve extraordinary things without burning out.

In a coaching session this week, my client delightedly reported big shifts in her life:

“Things are coming together. I’m shifting and changing what I feel about myself. Various aspects are aligning, dovetailing, and making sense. Synchronicities are happening. I'm more connected and involved. People are reaching out to me. I am receiving great feedback on the work I’m doing. My confidence is growing.”

She looks vibrant as she shares her experience.

I've been witness to these radical changes that she’s made as a result of the effort, courage, time and money my client has invested in turning her life around. From lonely, stuck, lost, and overwhelmed she has moved to this new clearer, brighter, more choiceful and energised place.

Then the familiar old survival habit kicks back in and she begins to stress that the changes are not happening quickly enough and to be fearful that she won’t have what it takes to achieve her goals. As she focuses on what she hasn't achieved rather than what she has, her shoulders hunch and she becomes monochrome.

You probably know both those states and how horribly quickly we can flip between them. I know I do.

Helping her refocus on her undeniable progress and return to a state of empowerment and happy acknowledgement is powerful. As is reminding her of how she achieved it. Consistent baby steps fuelled by optimism, determination, commitment, and courage led to these big changes in her circumstances. Even at times when it was more a case of discipline and will rather than actual belief.

Key to the coaching I’ve been doing with her is the process of shifting perspective from lack to abundance. From focusing on the negatives to deliberately putting attention on the positives.

This is not a misguided pollyannaish denial of reality. It is a scientifically proven understanding. Through empirical evidence in my own life, extensive research, and three decades of coaching experience I know that one of the most important routes to living the life of your dreams is shifting the lens through which you view yourself and your circumstances.

It’s simple but it’s not easy. Summed up in this quote by Greg McKeown, “If you focus on what you have, you gain what you lack. And if you focus on what you lack, you lose what you have.”

To enhance your opportunity for success, try looking at yourself and your life (however it is right now) through an optimistic and positive lens. Focus your attention on what you can appreciate and acknowledge and for now, as best you can, ignore the deficits.

Of course, there are issues and areas that need work but when you find more happiness with the status quo, solutions have a habit of presenting themselves and you empower yourself to move more fluently in the direction of your desires.

Changing long practised habits and the deep-seated beliefs that drive them is possible over time. Regular support is a vital ingredient in the recipe for finding an easier more enjoyable path.

In my weekly group coaching sessions, Heal Your Life and Goals To Reality, participants get help to find their way and keep going. If you are motivated to find an easier way come and join us.

Whatever results you are aiming for, however audacious or modest, there is a different way to manifest the experiences and achievements that matter to you.